MY WEEKLY LO-DOWN: WHY NOT EVERYONE NEEDS TO BE YOUR BEST FRIEND
My mom spent the day before my birthday in the city with me and we got onto the topic of kids that were from our area and how everyone is doing. Some doing really well and others have sadly gotten themselves into trouble despite growing up in a great family. My mom concluded that she firmly believes that it’s the people that you surround yourself with when growing up that help shape the adults we become. I believe this is true not only for our childhood years but for life.
Growing up my mom would always be overly nosey when it came to who I hung out with. She’d want to know about their family, their hobbies and dreams, or the classes they are taking and often gave me a hard time if she didn’t know them too well. However, if it was with someone like my friends Nina or Kaitlyn, the world was my oyster. She’d also always push me to include people from different circles when organizing a play date. I never really thought much about this until recently.
Throughout my life I have been fortunate enough to have met the most genuine and caring people in my life. At every stage of my life thus far I have walked away with at least one special friend greatly impacting my life. However, the best thing about my friendships is how strong their relationships are also with each other. For example, my 3rd grade friend Nina spent a weekend with my college roommate Brittany in Hong Kong and my abroad friend Feriel spent a summer with my suite mate Kiana on the West Coast. I owe it to my mom for teaching me how to be inclusive with my friendships and to ultimately help facilitate new ones as well. Plus, it makes group trips that much more fun! During my birthday trip to Nashville, I took a few moments to take in the moments and was in awe to see my friends from all different stages of life all genuinely enjoying each other’s company.
However, I firmly believe that people come into of your life for a reason but not necessarily is everyone meant to stay in it. I think it’s important for us to understand what we value in a friendship and to remember who is there for us when we may need them most. With this said, I also think it’s okay to have different levels of friends and being okay with that! People’s priorities change just as yours may so stay realistic and honest about that. As I have gotten older I have realized that there are some friends who I deeply connect with one on one but do not vibe with in group settings or that someone may have been your best friend sophomore year of college but you are on different pages in terms careers and personal lives now. I have recently come to terms with this and have been a lot more comfortable with investing my time into the friendships I care the most about. As long as each friend adds positivity into your life in some capacity (assuming you also return the favor!) then it works out having these different levels of friendships as understanding where each of your friendships lie allows you to be at peace with them as well. When you find those dear friends who support and uplift you, hold them tight and never let them go. I certainly am holding mine real tight!